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Wednesday, March 11, 2015

5 Common Habits Of Man-Repelling Women

Yikes! 5 Common Habits Of Man-Repelling Women


Of course, you’d never go out of your way to repel men (except for maybe the creepy ones). You like to think of yourself as the kind of woman who would happily and readily welcome the romantic advances of Mr. Right. You don't need dating advice ... sound familiar?
Then why haven't you settled down with anyone yet? Certain unconscious things you do might be scaring away these great guys you're meeting.
 
Is your own behavior holding you back from finding true, head-over-heels love? Here are some ways to tell: 
1. You think (subconsiously, maybe) that the right guy will save you.
We all know that neediness is an unattractive quality, but that doesn’t stop women from bringing it into their dating lives in one way or another.
Even though you may not think of yourself as a needy person, do you hope that a relationship, a man, or being married will somehow fix or save you from an otherwise meaningless life?
When you believe that a relationship or a man can complete you or suddenly give your life validation, that is definitely a sign that you are bringing neediness to the table.
Instead, realize that there isn’t anything wrong with you. You can have a complete and happy life without having a man or a relationship in it. This also doesn't exclude you from having a relationship. In fact, it makes you that much more desirable.
Fact: People are more attracted to women who live a full and complete lives on their own (with or without a partner).
2. You're a black hole of insecurity.
It’s normal to feel insecure and anxious from time to time. That’s part of being human. But living in a constant state of insecurity is not normal and it is a MAJOR turn off.
Whether it's constantly wondering if you look fat or needing reassurance that he still loves you, it is a total turn off.
Many men find this sort of behavior exhausting to deal with. Every “no, you don’t look fat” and “I love you” is sucked up into the bottomless black hole of insecurity, only to be followed with more insecurity a few moments later.
No matter what he says or does, it doesn't matter. On some level, you're assuming that you are not physically attractive or lovable, and thus it doesn’t matter how much reassurance he gives you, you’re still going to feel insecure.
It’s only a matter of time before he starts buying into your insecurities too. He’ll start to believe them himself because you’ve repeated them often enough, and he’ll disappear on you.
Learn how to accept yourself, no matter what. Are you perfect? Of course not, but you can still be emotionally okay with yourself wherever you may be and wherever you may still want to go.
3. You don't take the time to truly get to know the real him.
For all the effort you might put into communication, you might still need to work on listening. You hear the words he says, but may just evaluate them based on whether or not it fits into your life agenda (getting married, having kids, etc.).
Real listening is about more than simply hearing and judging another person. Real listening is about truly “getting” that person and allowing him to have an impact on you emotionally.
The key here is empathy.
He has fears, dreams, anxieties, hopes, and disappointments. Just like you, he’s trying to increase the amount of happiness in his life and feel less pain.
The more you can remember that, the easier it will be to truly listen.
4. You play the victim.
There are many women who feel like victims in this world. Some think they have been wronged by love, men, or even other circumstances entirely.
However, taking on a hardened, cynical attitude makes it hard to allow love into your life.
At best, you will repel people who are trying to reach out to you. At worst, you will invite only relationships with men who either consciously or unconsciously need to rescue you.
This will keep you trapped playing the victim of circumstance. You will need to constantly live in a world of drama and stress in order to continue playing the victim (and keep your relationship with your “white knight” going).
5. You're a chronic complainer.
A lot of people complain. It’s the primary means of communication for some groups of people.
However, complaining isn’t an attractive quality. Why? Because it’s a reflection of how you see the world around you.
When you complain, you focus entirely on the bad things in life, what you don’t want, and what you want to avoid. It’s only a matter of time before you turn the focus of your complaints onto your partner and start nitpicking him. (Would you volunteer for a relationship like that?)
To put it bluntly, being around negative people generally isn’t good for anyone's emotional well-being or outlook on life.
Have you ever noticed that most of the truly happy people complain very little? It’s not because their lives are so great that they complain so little, it’s because they complain so little that their lives are great.
When you talk about what you want (instead of what frustrates or angers you), you create a new type of energy. A positive attitude is very attractive.
We’ve covered five unconscious things that women do that repel men. Maybe you see yourself in a few of these. That’s OK.
The first step to getting past these and letting them go is gaining awareness. Once you are aware that you have a problem, you suddenly have more choice about how you choose to respond in any situation.
Just like any other habit, you can choose which ones you build and which ones you break.

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